What is a Stealth Vaping? A Zero Vaping Primer
We all love a vape. A quick hit of flavour and nicotine is a pleasure that millions of people around the world enjoy. But we don’t always want attention. A billowing cloud can easily lead to people making snide comments, wafting their arms around obnoxiously, and asking you to stop. And that’s fair enough. We don’t all want a cloud of second-hand vape in our face.
So at times, it makes sense to vape stealthily. Secretly. In this primer to the dark arts of zero vaping, we’ll explain what stealth vaping is and how to do it.
Before We Begin: Don’t Break the Law
Listen, this guide is going to teach you how to stealthily and sneakily have a zero vape. But that doesn’t mean it makes you – or the clouds – invisible. So if you’re foolhardy enough to use this guide in places where vaping is illegal, you’re going to end up in big trouble.
If you’re stealth vaping on a plane, in a movie theatre, or standing directly under a sign saying “No Smoking – Smokers will be Prosecuted” you will get in trouble. So be sensible.
Don’t zero vape where you can get in serious trouble.
Now let’s begin with a stealth vape.
One. Choose Your Weapon
When James Bond is sneaking around trying not to garner attention, what’s in his jacket pocket? A massive Kalashnikov assault rifle, or a discreet Walther PPK?
Does Jason Bourne carry a pickaxe, or does he dispatch his enemies quickly and quietly with a pencil?
Exactly. They use small, easily concealable items. And so will you. This isn’t the time for your chunky box mod. This isn’t hand-check territory. Instead you want something small and portable that’ll slip into a purse or an inside pocket. A pod vape is perfect.
Two: Lights Out
You know what draws attention? Lights. And even a discreet vape like a Zillion or a Jool has an LED light.
When you’re being sneaky and stealth vaping, that LED might as well be a lighthouse. So cover it up with a finger. In fact, practice holding your vape in your hand in such a way that people can’t see it at all.
If they can’t see it, they don’t know it’s there. And that means you’re being pretty stealthy.
Three: Take a Breath
Short inhales. One or two seconds. If you’re a cloud vaper, you’ll know that deep long inhales create big clouds. So here, we’ll do the opposite. Small, sharp breaths, and inhale a tight stream of vapor down and away.
Exhaling upwards just creates a smoke signal telling the world what you’re doing.
Please note: Blowing the vape down your shirt just makes you look like a little odd, and people will wonder why steam is escaping your collar.
That’s stealth vaping – short, discreet vapes that are hard to notice. But what if we get even more discreet? What if we vape in such a way that we produce next to no telltale vapour?
Now we’re in the world of zero vaping.
How to Zero Vape
Zero vaping is all in the breathing. Steps one and two are the same as stealth vaping, but you definitely don’t want to try this with a sub ohm vape. If you’ve got a variable resistance device, turn the voltage way down, and make sure you’re using a PG liquid.
Now, it’s time to breathe.
Method one is multiple short inhales. A quick snatch in of vape from your device. Hold it in. Don’t breathe out just yet. Instead, inhale another quick burst of air from your nose or mouth. Two or three more. Hold it for an extra second. Now exhale through all but closed lips.
You see? Very little cloud. Keep practicing. You’ll get there.
Method two is one long inhale. Take the vape into your mouth – not direct to the lungs – and hold it there. Now inhale deeply, about five seconds or so. Steady and deep. Hold it for a second, and exhale again through nearly closed lips.
Again, next to no vapour!
If you don’t quite get it right first time, practice somewhere you know you can vape – in the house or the car. And once you’ve mastered the zero vape, you can freely, stealthily vape around town with nobody spotting you.Just remember. Don’t try it on a plane.